E-votional - The Need To See
April 2, 2002

"So the other disciples told him, 'We have seen the Lord.' But he said to them, 'Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.' "

John 20:25 (NRSV)


   Let me see. We all like to see things that are new and different. Elements in our life that bring and exclamation point or period to the sentence of our life or situation. When we gaze at art, our wonder ranges from what must the artist seen, or experienced or felt. What it must be like to see music. We can hear music, but how fascinating it would be to see it. Before I went to Israel, I knew it was there, but I wanted to see it. When I visited the Holocaust Museum in Israel, I knew about the lives that were lost, but the scope of the tragedy did not hit me until I saw a tree planted for each person who lost their life. I was not truly touched until I saw a flicker of thousands of lights, the reflection of one of seven candles, in a dark room, representing the children killed in the holocaust. Seeing not only touched me, but it swallowed me whole.

   Hear the Good News, our gift of curiosity and even doubt is used by God to bring us into a deeper relationship to Him. You see, doubt is something we all have. It is a part of our assimilation of information. Doubt, many times, is the distance between the head and the heart. Israel and art bring, to me, a reminder of the distance traveled between our head and our heart. Thomas, his distance was so short, he was so close, that he knew what he needed. He was able to articulate it. This is to be applauded, not scorned. If only we were so aware as to what we needed in our life. If only we could let the words fall from our lips as to what it was that we needed to have our heart and head meet in matters of life, faith and love.


   Gracious God, it was as though Christ knew what it was that Thomas truly needed. And from the need, came the action, the meeting of Thomas and Jesus. Lord I ask that you allow me to be aware enough to be swallowed by my encounter with Christ. I too need Your experience in my life, just as Thomas, but who am I to ask? I know You say by being Your child this makes me one to be cherished, but I still have lingering feelings that are either humility or unworthiness or even doubt. Help me to have my head and heart meet. Thank You for all that You have done in my life and all You will continue to do, for ask this through Christ, my Lord and Savior. Amen.